Our love life was properly passionate in those early days and I’d never felt so happy. Even so, with the luxury of hindsight, there were clues my new husband was suffering from trauma.

I have a nice life – a house ... I share a bank account with my husband, so I couldn’t buy anything without arousing his suspicion. My lover couldn’t get me a gift for the same reason.

Dear Widow: I’m so sorry you have to deal with the shock and disorientation of the affair and the lies on top of the grief of ...